What is it about giving Thanks?

What is GRATITUDE (II)?

On October 1st I released this idea “Project GRATITUDE (II)”. I’ve expressed in part what it means but I want to take a chance in this juncture of the journey to give thanks in another way. To testify and to tell why God is moving in this way through me, and to tell “what it is about GRATITUDE”. What does this mean?

Now clearly, if I had as many people show up to my event as liked my recent photoshoot on instagram the house would be packed and I might sell all my paintings. Lol. Those beautiful photos and that opportunity to explore a different side of myself with other artists was a fun and empowering experience, but this show is not about saying “everyone look at me I am great”! I feel like social media can cast it that way….I want to be clear. There is a celebration of myself in this show, an appreciation for being a woman, an artist, for where I have come from, and of stepping into my dreams...that is there.

But after these paintings are hung Friday night, I probably will fall on my knees and have no other words to say that don’t involve every soul that I have ever been touched by, there will be no words that don’t attempt to tell the inexpressible, profound, and unconditional love I have for my village, my community, my life that is only because you are reading this.

GRATITUDE is me living my purpose. In the last four years since 2008 I have noticed a chapter in myself and in my life. Some of the conclusions and reflections of that are a learned deep and profound love I have for others. Another is that I believe my main reasons for being are to Love and to Serve (broad or general yes, but still significant). I do not always get to show this love I have, and I have not always expressed it as I should. I have been busy, forgetful, maybe selfish, late, but I have always held these wishes in my heart. I see now it’s in the little and big things, it’s in the actions and intentions, it begins with giving Thanks.

It begins with GRATITUDE.

I wanted to do this show when I graduated from college. That is clearly a significant milestone that is possible because of the love and support of countless individuals. College is not the end all be all; having a piece of paper or two is not the only pathway toward success, but accomplishing it is a grand moment in one’s life, certainly my Pan African Grad was one of the greatest days of my life. So to release a series of paintings, representing what I’d learned with my art degree, having something to show the community and village, and making that first show out of college about them was a dream…(Yes I know, I am always trying to do something special. Lol)

But why not? GRATITUDE is a celebration of life. That show how I wanted it was not possible, but I still had it with past paintings (technically it was the first GRATITUDE Exhibition). How I thought finishing a leadership position, a housing job, a full load of classes, and graduation requirements while painting a new series of paintings was possible in one quarter is clearly my idealistic side showing. ;) So the vision, the paintings, the colors, and the unveiling to loved ones remained in my heart and head until now. November became a month I wanted to have the show fittingly as Thanksgiving is in November. 2011 did not prove to be a suitable time for that, and 2012 didn’t seem so either. The dream grew during that year though and the significance of having this exhibit did too. This would not only be a new series of paintings as a graduate, collect all the talents and things I share day to day and put them in one place on a website, a chance to involve a community of artists who have watched me and helped me grow as a fellow artist and as a woman, and honestly just to get it all properly organized. ;) GRATITUDE now  wasn’t just 12 or 14 paintings with thank you’s, it was a movement, an experience, a reflection of self, and an opportunity to honor and cherish life.

How often do we do that? How often do we stop? How often do we write a hand written letter and put it in the mail?

And more so… how do we feel when we do?

How do we feel?! When we think of all we have, and not what we don’t! When we recognize special people, special memories, and say things we’ve held in our hearts but didn’t have the words to put together before?

I started to make lists…and ok, I am a serious list maker. There are literally hundreds of lists imposed and painted into the paintings…but I started making lists of how I would honor certain people. GRATITUDE started as one painting, then three, then five, then 14. And the names? Well, the names have not stopped coming. There are of course those in our closest circles, but the layers and layers continue after that, and I have done my best (almost obsessively) not to leave even one out.

Everyone cannot be our best friend…or can they? In the last four years in travels and just living, I am nearly to tears when I think of the incredible souls I’ve met that I wish I was better or was simply just able to stay in contact with. I know, people say you can’t do it all…but why not? Not everyone will be our best friend, I am confident anyone you meet can teach you or touch your heart.

So returning to October 2012, the moment I decided to pursue these paintings, these letters, this fundraiser, these events, this reflective time, this launching of business and website, and this reclaiming and honoring of pieces of my life…

The moment I chose to listen to that small, quiet but direct voice…everything fell into place.

On Wednesday Nov 6th I more than exceeded my goal! I am at $1,500+ and still growing! I am floored, I am humbled, I am swelling with appreciation!!!!! I was timid at first to ask for help in making GRATITUDE possible, it is celebratory and my business, “shouldn’t I do it for myself? Is it too much to ask? So many people have already helped me get here, I am already so blessed. I should have it together” I thought. But special souls came into place a pushed me…

and in that moment I chose…MIRACLES occurred.

All the people, the food, the places, the finances, the time, the inspiration, the ability, the paintings being made…it is all MIRACLE, truly a miracle (I have some stories to tell). And looking back now, it was somewhat of an easy miracle. Lol. Often we don’t even see that our dreams are so easily attainable until we take that step. EVERYTHING is there. I am not just living a dream, I am stepping into a purpose…to Love and to Serve. I’m not perfect, I will make more “mis-takes”, but I know I have certain gifts…to paint, to write poetry, to live paint, to teach, to lead, to speak, to sing (yeah that one I’m working on…lol), to organize, to shout, to be on time (lol), to work, to see projects complete, to be an artist, to Love, to Serve….there are other dreams I have everyone does not know of or will not see…YET. But let me tell you, this is a major first step in that direction. Because this was possible, I know ALL is possible.

WHAT IS IT ABOUT GIVING THANKS?

WHAT IS GRATITUDE (II)?:

IT IS THE RECIPIE AND THE FIRST STEP FOR CREATING MIRACLES.

What are you grateful for? What do you have? What are your hopes and dreams?

Are you afraid? Are you willing to get there? Are you ready to be there now?

Give thanks, and take the first step toward your dreams…then watch Miracles happen.

Whatever the belief system (God, no God, Christian, Buddist, Jewish, etc..)  it is FAITH. It is HOPE, it is LOVE, it is RIGHTEOUSNESS, it is COURGE, it is seeking to be the best you know how to be.

NOTHING IS LOST my mentor, professor, inspiration and one of many angels Dr. Humber recently said.

Are you too old? Is it too late? Is it too big? Are you too small? Is it right? Are you too poor? Did it “fail” before? Do people not understand? Is it hard? Is it impossible?

NO. NOTHING..... No Thing IS IMPOSSIBLE.

What are your dreams? Search yourself for the good feeling and hard questions, find YOUR answers, then start giving thanks for what you already have! You’ll realize you already have EVERYthing you are dreaming of! Finally take that first step…

Just find your truth, Take step one…

The rest already IS.

I love you. You are truly loved. GRATITUDE and all these words, actions, events, things won’t ever say it enough…but I at least want to try to say THANK YOU. I am because You are. I can because you are. Thank you for Being so that I can be who I was called to be.

Love, Blessings, and Light

-Shelley

I ALSO WANT TO TAKE THIS CHANCE TO JUST BEGIN TO GIVE PRAISE AND THANKS FOR ALL THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE been a part of making GRATITUDE (II), Nov. 2012 happen.

The donors…Dawn & Bryan Henderson, Sharon Magilaono Wood, Julia Wood, Stan and Lois Bruce, Elizabeth Gomez, Mary Tawaldros, A Mic and Dim Lights Family, Leah Jurilla, Hellena Ruiz, Odera Chute, Terrence Budd, Vanessa Wairco, Gheren Vitte, Will and Heather Pfeffer, Dr. Renford Reese, Lorena Marquez, Jabrilla Carr, Mary Brown, Alicia Marie, Monie D, Roxana Segovia-Bletran, Lee Ballinger, Crytsa Obeikia, Mercy Daramola, Pamela Dilworth, Kenny, Jazzmene Ellison, Cherise Evangelista, Rita Herr, Kumi Rauf, Ariana Bejar-Nasseri, Teisha Roby, Vanessa White, Cindy- Lee Marsh, Lizette Landa, Dr. Peggy Kelly, Monica Santander, Michelle Chan, Chris and Vanessa Spencer,  and several anonymous donors. (And if I forget anyone please forgive me they are still coming!!!)

The team and support…. Mary Tawaldrow, Matanah, Simmons, Lorena Marquez, Rodrigo Cedeno, Hellena Ruiz, Lucia Serrano, Judah 1, Treesje Powers, Besskepp Cory Cofer, Simpy Kat, Matt Bennett (Whyte Boy), Jerrence Owens, Laurence Michael, Mom and Dad, Pro Nation, IE Photo Rentals, Machine Pomona, Andy, and so many more!!!

All the people who will be there at the events… All those who can’t come, or couldn’t give, but just sent their love and hope. THANK YOU.

THANK YOU. THANK YOU.THANK YOU. You are a blessing. GRATITUDE (II)  is so I can be a blessing back.